Bitter Kabuki

On a Valentine's Day not so long ago, Eric, Melissa, Ethan, and I met Curtis.  That is when our Saki Bomb induced love affair with the crazy head chef at Kabuto began.  Who wouldn't love a guy who cracks himself up, gets you free Saki, and refers to you and your husband as "the drinking couple"?  His hibachi skills are not the best, but it's never a boring night when Curtis is working your table.  If you go to the ghetto Kabuto on Midlothian Turnpike, request him.  There may be rap blaring from the kitchen, but you will barely notice if Curtis is cooking for you.

The last time we went to Kabuto, we did not have Curtis.  We had another guy whose skills were much better, but he never cracked a smile.  I remember him because when he did the infamous onion volcano, he put the fire out with a water bottle shaped like a little boy.  When you squeezed him, his pants came down and he "tinkled" water on the volcano.

Two nights ago at Yamato (we cheated on Kabuto because Yamato is closer), we saw the chef with the tinkling water bottle!  Of course, Ethan and I were curious why he was cheating on Kabuto.  After he spun an egg and cracked it on the side of his spatula, we asked him if he used to work at Kabuto's.

Let this be a lesson to us - never strike up conversation with a hibachi chef, unless it is Curtis.  There was no more entertainment after the question was asked.  Instead, he went on a tirade about the egotistical head chef of Kabuto!  He explained that Curtis insisted that each chef keep their own tip instead of tip sharing.  Apparently this is unfair to the chefs who aren't as good as Curtis.  He said it made the environment too competitive and that worse chefs cooked more quickly to get to other tables in order to make more money.  The non-smiling tinkling water bottle chef went on and on about how much he hated Curtis and how he had worked at more than five hibachi restaurants and never had such a selfish head chef. 

While this was going on, Ethan and I pretended to be interested and the other people at the table were clearly bored by the fact that there was no fire or shrimp tossing.  Maybe this is why the guy had worked at over five hibachi restaurants.  He claimed that Curtis' salt and pepper juggling skills were terrible, but I would rather have seen that than listen to him complain.

The bottom line is, don't complain about your competitors...it makes you look like the idiot.  If anything, it made Ethan and I miss Kabuto.  Long live Curtis!